A Quiet Turning

There are moments
when I feel it rising —
a quiet tug toward old thoughts,
familiar patterns that once promised safety
but only ever gave me silence and shame.

It doesn’t shout.
It whispers.
You’re too much.
You’re not enough.
You’ll never get it right.

And for a moment,
I believe it again.
Not because it’s true —
but because it’s been loud for so long.

I carry those echoes
into rooms where I smile.
Into the spaces where I show up,
even when I feel unsteady.

But lately, I’m learning
to pause before the story runs away with me.
To ask:
What am I feeling?
Where is this coming from?
And what’s the truth I know beneath the noise?

I remember:
I am loved.
I am not a burden.
I am not the sum of my worst days.

And from that place —
even if it’s just a small step forward —
I respond differently.
More gently.
More freely.

This is what healing sounds like sometimes.
Not loud or linear —
just a quiet turning toward peace
when the pull of the past returns.

And I carry this quiet work of healing into the way I love — gently, intentionally, even on the hardest days.

A Letter to the Present Moment

I used to think healing meant moving forward —
quickly, cleanly, clearly.
But I’ve come to realize,
some of the most important parts of healing
happen when I’m not going anywhere at all.

Just here.
Still.
Sitting in the slow stretch of the present moment.

It’s not always comfortable.
I find myself reaching for distractions,
searching for answers,
wishing for resolution.

But I’m learning not to rush this season.
Not to escape it,
fix it,
or numb it.

Just…
to be in it.
To breathe through it.
To let it shape me
without stealing me.

There’s something sacred here —
in the pause,
in the waiting,
in the not-yet-knowing.

So tonight, I’m practicing presence.
Letting today be enough.
Letting now be holy.

They say, “the most beautiful skies come after the worst storms.”
Who they are, I’ll never know.
But I do know this —
it’s true.
And I can’t wait to see just how beautiful the sky is.